sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Randomize
