I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
50% drunk capacity currently
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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