meet me or not, i'm out of control
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
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