i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize