but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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