Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
