It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
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