marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'm jealous of your bromance
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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