i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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