The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Two words: nipple clamps
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