Texts From Last Night

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  (650): View more from California

  Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?

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  (650): Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards? http://tfl.nu/fenr
  Replies (9) Good night (1748) Bad night (484) Order T-Shirt
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  (810): View more from Michigan

  I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo

  (810): View more from Michigan

  With himself

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  (810): I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo (810): With himself http://tfl.nu/5c4h
  Replies (1) Good night (717) Bad night (940)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.

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  (715): I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis. http://tfl.nu/unom
  Replies (8) Good night (1081) Bad night (3494) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.

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  (610): i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window. http://tfl.nu/q9w7
  Replies (24) Good night (4928) Bad night (1166) Order T-Shirt
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.

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  (847): sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant. http://tfl.nu/gemh
  Replies (15) Good night (857) Bad night (5776) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.

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  (206): Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week. http://tfl.nu/twaw
  Replies (44) Good night (5174) Bad night (1342) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.

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  (910): Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job. http://tfl.nu/jru8
  Replies (6) Good night (3075) Bad night (628) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???

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  (253): How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister??? http://tfl.nu/ukzw
  Replies (13) Good night (1824) Bad night (1027) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.

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  (817): Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment. http://tfl.nu/91us
  Replies (7) Good night (705) Bad night (1791) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them

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  (570): Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them http://tfl.nu/2e8h
  Replies (4) Good night (895) Bad night (442) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.

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  (512): I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas. http://tfl.nu/ufwf
  Replies (27) Good night (3865) Bad night (514)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too

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  (317): I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too http://tfl.nu/ini4
  Replies (11) Good night (493) Bad night (1222) Order T-Shirt
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  (307): View more from Wyoming

  You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.

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  (307): You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home. http://tfl.nu/j8m0
  Replies (9) Good night (339) Bad night (1659) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.

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  (817): I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita. http://tfl.nu/fdg7
  Replies (3) Good night (517) Bad night (165) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down

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  (248): The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks (248): Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down http://tfl.nu/3xjk
  Replies (2) Good night (673) Bad night (187)

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