I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Randomize
