just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize