i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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