See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
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