sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
He has the fingertips of a God
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