Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
