Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
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