I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.