I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Let's get the cat blown out
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
