I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
