Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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