I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
