I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
