no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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