is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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