Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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