he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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