You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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