I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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