it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
