I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense