new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
