why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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