its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
