whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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