You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Randomize
