When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize
