i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize