u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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