Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
