and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize