hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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