My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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