Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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