why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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