Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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