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I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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