Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Randomize
