I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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