theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
