Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he laminated a picture of his dick.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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